The Worry Cure by Robert L. Leahy Ph.D

Author:Robert L. Leahy, Ph.D. [Leahy, Robert L.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-0-307-33815-0
Publisher: Crown Publishing Group
Published: 2005-02-08T16:00:00+00:00

Climb a Ladder of Meaning

Often psychologists focus on what is wrong with you and how you are thinking irrationally. But frustration and anxiety can often point to what is valuable and meaningful to you.17 One technique that I use is called “laddering.” I ask you to take what you are feeling anxious or worried about and climb a ladder of meaning that leads to your higher values. What does this mean? Let’s take Jennifer, who worried that her husband had lost interest in her. I attempted to use the laddering technique to elicit her higher values, values that she could be proud of and could eventually learn to use to build a better relationship with Joe.

I asked Jennifer what it meant to her when she was ignored. We then began climbing the ladder: “I need him to pay attention because when he pays attention it means he cares about me, and this meets my need for love and affection and closeness, because if I have love and affection and closeness, I will feel that life is complete and I can give love, because I am a loving person.”

Laddering allowed Jennifer to climb to a higher level—higher than anger, anxiety, loneliness, and feeling unloved. It points to what is good about her: she is a loving person and wants closeness. Of course, realizing that you have these higher values does not mean you will get what you want. Indeed, you can also feel sad recognizing that you strongly value something but may not be getting it at the present time. However, rather than feeling unloved and empty, the laddering technique allowed Jennifer to feel affirmed and validated in her needs.

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